Yes…And
Yes And comes from the world of improvisational theatre. These two tiny words put together pack quite the punch when it comes to improvising but also when it comes to connection. When someone makes a bid for connection be it a partner asking whether you’d like to watch a show with them or a colleague sharing an idea, when we respond with ‘yes and’ instead of ‘yes but’ we have to acknowledge their idea and build on it. It naturally fosters better connection and positive feelings towards the other person.
Exercise:
Find a partner.
First you are going to have a play with ‘Yes But’
One of you in going to make an offer - to get going, let’s say it’s a holiday i.e. “Ace, let’s go to Portland..”. Then you being every sentence with the words “yes but” i.e. “Yes but it’s too far and I don’t like flying”
Play back and forth for a couple of minutes and then stop and reflect. What did you notice? How did it feel? Was it familiar?
Now your going to play again - one person makes an offer - but this time you’re going to begin every sentence with the words “Yes And”
Play it back and forth for a few minutes and then reflect again. What did you notice this time? How did it feel? What happened? How was it different?
Think about where you can be using “Yes And” more. Maybe with your employees, or your boss, or your partner or your kids…..experiment!
